It's actually Thursday 1:30 am and I have to be at work at 9am Thursday, tomorrow morning. If I were wise I wouldn't be online this time of night.
But this is important. To maybe ONE person out there. This is all in code. You'll know if I'm talking to you. No, I don't know who you are. Don't be paranoid. You've been asking, "why, why WHY did this happen? How did it happen?!!!"
And now you may be getting your answer, or part of it.
I'm thinking of the movie Wizard of Oz right now, for no particular reason, except for the reason this post is written in code. O E O. Ohhh YA. O E O. Ohhh YA. O E O. Ohhh YA.
And maybe that fact that I just stated is all you need to find the peace you want.
But if it's not?
You might do worse than reading:
Father Melancholy's Daughter by Gail Godwin. Read the sequel, Evensong, as well.
Weep. Remember. Grieve the way you never had a chance to.
Pass it on, when you've healed enough and are ready to pass it on. Might be decades from now.